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"Hilarious." – Daniel Hannan

Archive for June, 2010

Crazy, Awesome, or Crazy-Awesome?

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From the WSJ:

Gary Brooks Faulkner, 50 years old, of Greeley, Colo., was caught by Pakistani police Monday in the remote Bumburat Valley near the border of Afghanistan’s Nuristan province, where he apparently hoped to find Mr. bin Laden.

Faulkner was on his sixth mission to Pakistan to personally kill Usama Bin Laden.  He was armed with night vision goggles, a pistol, a 40-inch sword, and an apparently epic Tarantino-esque sense of righteous vengeance.

The article didn’t specify, but I think it’s safe to assume this was also among his personal effects.

Written by MikeM

June 18th, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Culture of Entitlement

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Nancy Pelosi’s new office will cost taxpayers $19,000/month. 
In Soviet Russia, some are more equal than others

Written by MikeM

June 15th, 2010 at 4:45 pm

What do you mean, we’re not allowed to beat the peasants?

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Welcome to a world where our politicians are so self-important they think it’s appropriate to put a choke hold on an inquisitive student.  We are creating that world here in America now.

Written by MikeM

June 15th, 2010 at 3:29 pm

ONION: Candidate May Have Lied About Heroic Death In Vietnam

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“Folks in Alabama are worried about their jobs and providing for their families, not this junk,” Wilfred campaign spokeswoman Deana Riggs said. “Come November, voters aren’t going to care about who did or didn’t die in this or that war.”

“Chris Wilfred is the man for the job,” Riggs continued. “God rest his soul.”

SEE ALSO: Candidate’s Words on Vietnam Service Differ From History (NY Times).

Written by Moog Rogue

June 14th, 2010 at 8:34 am

Desperately Seeking Tony Award Winners With Ideas To Stop Spill

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We’ve already heard from the Oscar winners– Kevin Costner, James Cameron, Robert Redford… Hell, we’ve even heard from a Grammy Award winner– it’s time for some of Broadway’s finest to chime in!

Sorry, there are no polls available at the moment.

Written by Moog Rogue

June 11th, 2010 at 1:53 pm

Whose ass to kick?

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After lengthy, deliberate (and naturally cool, calm and collected) conversations with the top minds in academia, Obama has discovered that corporations are led by something called “Chairman of the Board”.  Target identified, commence the ass kicking!  Government smash!

Or, through a proxy (Coast Guard Admiral Thad Allen), politely request a meeting.  Then, have your press secretary come out with some firm language like “we aren’t opposed to possibly meeting with relevant BP officials…you know, if they wanted to.  Or whatever.”

Okay so I’m paraphrasing, but not by much.  Gibbs’ briefing really does make it sound like the administration is a little proud at figuring out what a “Board of Directors” is.

Keep up the ass kicking, guys.  I’m sure BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg has plenty of knowledge relevant to actually fixing the problem.

Written by MikeM

June 10th, 2010 at 6:08 pm

ONION: Boston Globe Tailors Print Edition For Three Remaining Subscribers

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We also made the paper smaller. That way it was easier for Michael to read it on the train. Buddy’s not going to be thrilled about it. I know he liked the way the big pages covered his lap while he masturbated at the library’s computers– but we think the new jumble will make up for that.


Boston Globe Tailors Print Edition For Three Remaining Subscribers

Written by adminiskater

June 9th, 2010 at 12:21 pm

Obama Can’t Be Bothered To Speak To BP CEO

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Via Allahpundit at Hot Air, Matt Lauer interviews Barack Obama and is understandably incredulous when Obama reveals he hasn’t spoken to BP CEO Tony Hayward.  There is so much wrong with this I hardly know where to begin:

I have not spoken to him directly and here is the reason. Because my experience is when you talk to a guy like a BP CEO, he’s going to say all the right things to me. I’m not interested in words. I’m interested in actions.

So Obama’s experience when speaking to business leaders is that they misrepresent facts? And these leaders have been so consistently duplicitous, in Obama’s experience, that he doesn’t feel the least bit curious what the CEO of one of the world’s largest energy companies—and a company responsible for the worst environmental catastrophe in American history—might have to say? No interest whatsoever?

Moments later, when Lauer asks the president if he’d fire Tony Hayward, Obama replies that “he wouldn’t be working for” him– despite never having spoken to him.

If Hayward’s reaction to the spill is so patently horrible that it merits his firing without so much as a conversation, then why the hell is Obama still permitting him to lead the efforts to fix this mess?

Maybe Obama believes that chief executives are just impotent figureheads. He certainly seems to have embraced that role for himself.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

UPDATE: MikeM adds,

For someone so “cool, calm and collected” he’s really a rhetorically careless fucktard.

UPDATE: Touched By Fire has more.

I think this exchange does a lot to wipe away the guise that Obama has any idea what he’s doing. And it’s genuinely kind of frightening.

Written by Shittypundit

June 8th, 2010 at 6:35 pm